It's nowhere near April...

Ha. This is what computers are good for! I want one.

At least this will make some news stories easier to digest!!

Will it be able to put Paris on my toast, think of the fun!!

Otherwise it goes cold while you read the news or you go straight for the butter and marmalade which will obscure the text. I think I'll stick with the paper thanks.

google for java toaster weather

still, this might be next best thing to sliced bread!

It's been done before...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/1264205.stm

and also in fact

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2001/03/30/java_toaster_prints_weather_forecast/

...still think it's a rubbish idea though!

The google appliance?

Burn ads for breakfast cereals onto toast.

Will this be another of those things that "every household needs" that just end up in a drawer, or in your local tip? If so, leave me out!

And I want it firewire powered.

I'm actually enougth of a geek that I WOULD by this.

This NEEDS to be mass produced!

Do you need special toast to burn in the highest resolution?

How many spm can it do?

Does it duplex?

to read the news through butter and Marmite!

Paris cos I bet she likes Marmite.

Efros

Oh I must have one!

Can we start a Reg Petition to force electrolux to manufacture this.

Presumably on a slow news day you just get a piece of bread.

Also, wouldn't the toast be cold by the time you have read the news when it comes to actually eating it?

Although I suppose it does make it easier to burn a crude image of Jesus or the Virgin Mary onto it, for a quick sale on eBay.

that toasted news is at least a couple of minutes of reading.

<--toasty

is a USB microwave

This is a bit old shirley

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2001/06/04/bread_as_a_display_device/

The Register had this from 2001:

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2001/06/04/bread_as_a_display_device/

Then when the bit on the side emails me, I can eat the evidence?

Or use the device for a daily pr0n fix!

The paperless office.

...Talky Toaster, all is forgiven.

Getting my coat because endless references to cult comedy classics was old before Python made their first film...

I wonder how many virgin marys and jesuses you could sell on ebay before the naturally gullible religious nuts catch on.

How long until there is malware that will put "v1agra" adverts on the toast instead of my daily news?

I for one will still welcome our toast messaging overloards. We need more computer connected kitchen appliances.

On that note, where the hell is my networked coffee maker? I want one! (no puns about a java interface please.)

would you like a toasted tea-cake?

When hot, Marmite gets quite thin and runny. Surely you could ink jet that onto toast in any image you like.

Maybe lacking in contrast against well done toast though.

since when has a slice of toast - however it is marked - been accompanied by two finely sliced bits of orange pepper?

yours,

first time poster

keebo

reading - top down

toast eating - bottom up

So I guess it's best to print in two halves

How does one distinguish between a picture from the morning news and, say, an apocalyptic message from God heralding one's imminent doom? After all, as regulars here know, toast is a preferred medium of divine revelation.

Not really such a hot idea is it? I mean newsprint, for example, is mostly white. That means that if you printed news on it, you'd basically be eating mostly un-toasted bread. If it's been in the fridge it could even still be decidedly chilly.

The examples in the picture show this quite clearly. Loads of cold, stodgy white bread in between the rather small interesting bits. Not exactly what you want to underpin your Oxford marmalade at breakfast, now is it?

FAIL.

There are on consideration a few pitfalls I can see which would make me not want this is, but I'm sure they could be resolved!

1) It only seems to do 1 slice at a time :/

2) If it's a busy news day I'm gonna need alot of bread

3) It would need a media size detection feature so as to work out that I have instead toasted a waffle!

Also would this have a duplex option?

Too busy makin' the world work to have fun you joyless admins.

You can read a news story printed on a slice of toast about the image of Jesus appearing on a slice of toast.....

You can burn a picture of your least favorite co-worker/ex onto a slice of toast and then berate it as "Your toast dude!!"

You can pass love notes to your co-workers/mistress over a lunch of corn beef on rye...then you can destroy the evidence!! No more incriminating emails or letters!

The first "Internet Appliance" was a Sunbeam toaster hooked up to the 'net and on display at Interop 1990. Using a web interface (under SNMP), you could (1) specify how light or how dark you wanted the toast and (2) activate the toasting function. We've come a long way ... and yet, not.

http://www.faqs.org/rfcs/rfc2235.html

...you can't have your toast and read it too.

Not to mention the pot of cream..! Perhaps it's a delicacy somewhere on Earth...

Red: Raspberry

Green: Kiwi fruit

Blue: Blueberry

Toast only has a back and a front: ie a front page and a sports page. Where are the tits?

http://www.evilmadscientist.com/article.php/cnctoast includes pictures and video of their device in action.

Could you make a flick-book animation from an entire loaf though?

...can now eat their words.

how else can they eat their words?

(or just swallow everything they're told)

The internet is not used for news.....

It's the toaster that lets you have a strumpet on your morning crumpet.

It's the raincoat with sticky sleeves please....

"Sorry kids, your dad's gone and forgotten to switch printers again and the holiday snaps are all on wholemeal."

OK, may not be as anoying as actualy saying it, but what happens when your toast comes out each time with something like:

"Do you want any toast?"

"How about a muffin?"

"The question is this: given that God is infinite and that the universe is also infinite...

"would you like a toasted tea-cake?"

Spreading jam on parts of Paris (Hilton that is)

yum!

Paris - because I'd like to see her all buttered up and covered in Marmite.

Does it talk?

On one side of the toast print the words "Butter the other side". Then, on the other side, print the words "Butter the other side".

Now, drop the toast on the floor. Which way up does it land?

Mine's the one with the butter stain down the front.

....I received the 'toastvertisement' "Are you having problems with the size of your slice?"

Spam on toast, anyone?

OK, I tried, right???

wow can you imagine this "branded" with cartoon of the day something like Far Side. It would sell like hot cakes. Every Starbucks in the world would buy one. Really hope this makes it onto the high street, what a xmas present, way better than socks. Electrolux, make this before Apple do !

Did you mistype 'to Windows' again ?

Look good if you like SPAM on your toast...

"designer Sung Bae Chang said he got the idea whilst - you guessed it - making some toast."

Whatever he's smoking, can I have some? Sounds like some really good shit.

Eeh, I dunno - where I were a lad we used to eat Mars Bars to combat the munchies. Guess toast is the 'healthy option' ...

It's the one with the Rizlas in the pocket.

An internet toaster have to be the ideal conduit for pop up advertising.

RE: "Where are the tits?"

They're commenting on this article :-)

I need a toaster... and this is the perfect excuse to have a PC built into a cupboard with touch screen display, etc...

quite possibly the best kitchen appliance EVAR!

Think radical.

I once bought in a US airport a wonderful little book called "Wrong Shui". Brilliant. Chuckled the whole flight home, much to the consternation of the crew.

For example, "When arranging your house, never put a Rock near a Hard Place".

But, "If your toast always falls on the floor butterside down, simply butter the other side".

Problem solved. And you can still read the news. Or oggle Paris. With a bit of lubricant...

OK. got it.