Off to the store to buy my nice, fat turkey, and fixin's to make dressing. (I don't do stuffing; too uneven cooking and not enough room in the bird!)

A bunch of rich nut jobs. The rather you strave to death than to eat meat.

Well it made a change from defending forts or sending stick-men to their deaths. Who'd they get to make it? The folk behind Happy Tree Friends?

Awesome until the sickening last "chapter".

Pass me some tasty PETA members. I mean, while turkeys might be bright and have differing personalities, PETA consistently shows us they belong down at the bottom of the food chain with yeast and bacteria. And at least those two provide us with tasty beverages and cooking supplies.

Honestly, any group that thinks the American Humane Society is filled with animal-hating miscreants and has members who feel that eating yeast is animal abuse is obviously of negligible sentience.

You will be shamed by this game into making a tofu-turkey but after sampling the disgusting taste of a tofu-turkey, the game will become very handy indeed in instructing you in how to dispatch and prepare a real and real tasting turkey.

Random thoughts: (1) Would be funny if it became more popular than the original game. (2) If you've already killed the turkey, what's the point switching to tofu? (3) Ever had Tofurky? Think THX 1138. (4) "The best thing we can do for the environment is kill ourselves". Ok, let's say I agree. You first.

Especially as you don't actually get to cook the thing.

Now hand me that plate or gagh - I'm feeling peckish.

I want to download a copy and play it. i reckon it'll be a hit in our office.

So these PETA people are perfectly prepared to murder and torture poor innocent plants for their Thanksgiving Dinner? Tomatoes have feelings too, you bastards! They're just kingdomists...

That was the best fun Ive had in ages. I mean seriously......plucking the feathers.....scalding live birds.....ripping out their internal organs (and then cooking them)....

AWESOME even Fallotu 3 has nothing on it....now when do we get a Cooking PETA game?

idiots

/mines the one with the flayed PETA skin in the pockets.

So after going to all the effort to prepare the turkey, she decides not to eat it? I would have thought PETA would consider that worse than eating turkeys.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9ijLulwUTY

I think it says it all nicely.

i am glad they have such a worth while campaign to fight... i mean i cannot think of anything else important at the moment in world can you?

i mean, that game is terrible...

what a bunch of tossers, go and do something with your life... i bet they all have iPhones as well

Paris - cos she is a waste of time as well....

Politicians tell me that playing Kaboom will turn me into a terrorist and that Billy Suicide will make me top myself. Logically, Cooking Mama: Mama Kills Animals must make me want to hack up animals. I think the only thing that’s saved me is not being a mother.

"...suffering endured by turkeys and other animals who are killed for food..."

That's just nature. I don't see them petitioning lions to stop eating zebras.

Anyway, there are some of us who have no other option as we're unable to synthesize some of the proteins that can only be found in meat.

That whenever I here PETA do something like that, I get a craving for some Bacon?

Mines the one with the foil wrapped sarnies in the pocket thanks.

The whole organisation disgusts me. I used to support them for some of their animal rights causes, but recently in the past few years they have turned into a screaming evil and immoral crowd of shits.

Peta. People Eat Tasty Meat.

Mainly because, as the article says, the game is actually quite fun to play. In fact, in a quite irresponsible move, PETA have done exactly what game developers wish they wouldn't, and tried to tie a video game to reality. I guess at least when I'm caught sacrificing turkeys now I can claim that PETA made me do it with their gory video game.

I notice that among the facts they give about turkey "murder", they fail to mention that tofu tastes like a sweaty asshole.....

Cue vegetarians telling me that I'm wrong, and tofu doesn't taste like a bum crack.

I found the tofu endgame bland and distasteful, no surprises there then!

The turkey part was actually quite fun although I'm not sure I drip with blood while plucking feathers or cracking eggs. I didn't think PETA was against egg eating?

Also, I was reminded of the PETA southpark episode as soon as mama started loving animals and was informed that people living with turkeys in sanctuaries report they have varying tastes in music.

Can we have a version where you first need to kill the bugger with a shotgun, pick all led out and then start cooking? also don't forget to feed all internal organs to evil dogs. That would be cool. Come on PETA!

Penguin bacause... you know PENGUIN instead of Turkey!!!

Its hard to find a flash game I can play at work....

It was a lot of fun till the TOFU then i had to quit....

yup, i'm a vegetarian.

what's your score?

But that's actually fun.... Probably wrong way to go about it though PETA, maybe you should stick to terrorism.

I wonder if they remembered to license the name, graphics et. al.

I'm sure that Messrs Sue, Grabbit and Runne could do quite well out of this. I'm not sure what sort of assets PETA have though, they could be flogging a dead horse here...........(oops).

Not bad, I made it to 950-odd points, plenty meaner than mama, but the tofu was too gross to continue.

Still, Peta have a lot to learn about a nice turkey, not least that it should be hung long enough for the blood to drain out first.

Nice one, El Veg, it's only 10am and I'm already salivating for a nice medium-rare steak...

I fully support this, as I'm all for the ethical treatment of completely imaginary animals. Too long have imaginary slices of fluffy animal been imaginarily mistreated at the hands of imaginary chefs.

Good job, PETA!

Good stuff - also notable is Peta's recent rebranding of fish as "sea kittens" to improve their public image.

http://www.peta.org.uk/sea_Kittens

You can even make your own "sea kitten" complete with choices such as Fu Manchu and German Moustaches. Hours of endless fun for children playing with racial stereotypes.

OK, anyone who helps support PETA to do things that actually matter should be sad to see their money being used to create a gross, mean, and stupid game. "Shaming" them?? You've got a funny sense of what it is to shame someone, PETA.

that thinks cows shouldnt be milked...

...that it was so hard to cut off a turkey's head.

Perhaps a cleaver would be a more appropriate implement?

It's giving me RSI! *grrr*

While I am all for a considerate approach to meat (in fact all foods) consumption, this again shows what whiney little priss bitches are located at PITA. See, instead of boozing in front of the telly or pimping out her daughters for drugs, Mommy is spending all her day doing icky things to the (free-running, organic-feed, humanely killed — she cares) turkey so that by the end of the day her family can enjoy a festive meal.

I was having great fun with this until the stfu round, then my heart just wasn't in it.

I'll get me coat - it's the bloodstain gory one with entrails hanging out of the pockets.

...we acquired colour binocular vision with a high-definition central focus area and canines for eating leaves?

We're friggin' omnivores and that means we eat some meat (around 20% of our diet).

So long as the beast has been killed humanely by a well trained slaughterer, it's time to chow down.

I suggest that PeTA remonstrate with some lions face-to-face about their habits. Oh wait, they're animals. That's natural. Well here's a clue, humans are animals too! Why should we not also follow what is natural for us?

I think someone needs to teach PETA how to exsanguinate their virtual turkeys...

...Where do I join?

that is awesome.

If a game is that much fun, killing a real turkey must be even better.

I will be popping off tonight to the local farm to see if I can kill some.

Meat is murder.

Tasty, tasty murder

Jeremy Clarkson had several accounts on El Reg these days.

“prepare a Thanksgiving dinner by going through the motions of plucking a turkey's feathers, pulling out its guts and cutting off the head.”

For others who wish to do so, I recommend cutting off the head first, then plucking the feathers with gloves or a pair of pliers. The feathers are sharp as a knife when you pull agents the grain. The only thing I agree with peta about is that it is good thing for people to prepare their own food; the fact that people don’t have to butcher animals any more has made them weak, fat and unwilling to do unpleasant things no mater how necessary they are.

No it is not that bloody, it sprays just a little when you cut off the head, and just oozes a bit out of the feather holes.

Mine is the one with the pliers in the pocket.

Once again Peta go for another soft target.

They are as gutless as the turkey after I've prepared it!

You will never see peta claiming that halal = terrorism will you?

Go on I dare ya!

Outside the Finsbury Park Mosque

Pussies!

As a lifelong member of PETA I wholeheartedly endorse this new game. It just shows that even you can prepare a delicious turkey for your dinner plate. This has been a PETA production - People Eating Tasty Animals.

One little thing I always like to point out to particularly overzealous veggie types is where their tofu is coming from. Whilst I know where the meat I eat comes from (it is organically produced on a farm in Devon), the soya used to make tofu isn't grown in this country. The breakdown is something like this*:

US 40%

Brazil 24%

Argentina 18%

China 8%

India 3%

Paraguay 2%

Other 5%

So you pretty much have a choice there - grown in the US from GM Monsanto beans, or in Brazil or Argentina on ex-rainforest. Add on your transport, processing costs, etc.

and it suddenly doesn't seem so 'ethical' any more. Plus, as previously mentioned, it tastes like shit.

*(http://www.soystats.com/2005/page_30.htm)

...or is PETA - supposedly an animal welfare group - now in fact just a coalition of militant vegetarians, vegans, fruitarians and other such?

I'm all for the ethical treatmant of animals in farms, I'm dead against factory farming and think all the creatures destined for our tables (be they four legged, two legged or scaly and swimming) deserve to live before they die for our insatiable apetite for flesh. However, as an avowed omnivore (God, Mother Nature and Father Darwinism made us that way, why resist?) I'm not going to stop eating them. I do, however, intend to stear my consumption away from factory-farmed produce.

However PETA seems to think that this behaviour - the eating of poor defenceless animals - is immoral by definition. I find it insulting to have this bunch of holier-than-thou seed eaters imply that anyone who enjoys cooking meat must automatically glory in the pain of dying creatures, and seek to do them in in the most painful way possible. I'm a fscking pussy when it comes to any kind of suffering - humane killing is always the way forward.

Incidentally, I also wonder what PETA thinks would happen to all the cute little lambikins and calfikins if they ever succeeded in their aim of turning us all veggie. Would farmers keep breeding them out of the goodness of their hearts, keeping them in the peace and harmony of a new ovine/bovine utopia? No. We'd need their fields to grow all the extra fruits and grains which would then be our staple diet - there'd be no room in the great scheme of veggie-farming for baa-baas and moo-moos. Surely it's better for these animals to have a short yet comfortable life (as long as suffering is avoided) than *no life at all*?

Score of 1065...

Gettin! Almost as good as Zombie Flesh Eaters: The Game(TM)!

Flame, because I love roasts!

OK the propaganda machine is in overkill at Peta. I have never cracked open an egg only to have copious amounts of blood and feathers come out.

I know it's only a game but to make us feel guilty about eating an unfertilised egg that was never going to produce a living creature is ridiculous.

...Clarkson demonstrating the V8 powered blender and making a blood, beef fillet and brick smoothie with it.

PETA, People who Eat Tasty Animals, will never, ever stop shooting themselves in the foot, will they?

Mines the Penguin, ready to be skinned, cooked and devoured.

So in a world where violent games make kids kill people*, a bunch of animal-loving loonies release a game about killing (but not eating) turkeys...the mind boggles, it really does.

Thanks PETA, but I already know where my meat comes from; a part-time job on a farm took care of that. I'll promise not to make you eat meat if you keep your propaganda to yourselves...

*Does anyone still believe that?

If someone released something like this seriously, considering the people buying games are quite often the same people that went to Ogrish, Spoontard and Rotten.com for the lulz before they were tamed or shut down, the game would sell loads!

/has gutted chicken for a living; mines the one with the steakhouse menu in the pocket.

You were sooo close to nailing that one, I'm sure if you gave it another try you could get it. Clue: The last word must start with an 'A', hmm.......

Where are the naked (whist still covered up) supermodels? You could have at least included a few shots from previous campaigns.

While I agree that animal suffering should be kept to a minimum/non-existent and that meat production is inefficient, I honestly can't stand eating vegatables (I like fruits, but I still need something with some kick to it). The taste is just gross and I'd eat bugs before I ate brocolli or cauliflower. peta fails to realize that even animals don't like to eat soy product. It has to be mixed with something else. Maybe it's the incredibly bland taste.

Reminds me of college when an ex lived in a vegan house. They had a cookout and someone was trying to convince me that the tofu/sprout burger tasted just like beef. Considering that I like to taste the blood, it amounted to eating tasteless and textureless grass. Lucky for me that one of the girl's father was visiting. He had cooked up some chili (spiced beef, no veggies... and this guy entered competitions) and my ex and I were the only two that would eat it. Worked out pretty well, since there was plenty to gorge myself.

Of course, there was a 'real world' episode where the girl accidently ate some pig meat and forced herself to throw it back up. I'd buy that if it ever came out on disc because it was so funny. She was fine until someone told her.

For making me realise just how easy and rewarding it is to cook your own turkey.

Given that most of the concerns raised in the game about eating turkey relate to the fact that turkeys are farmed in terrible conditions with no quality of life, surely this means that buying a live turkey and raising it in your back garden at home, then killing and preparing it yourself, would be a million times better than buying a pre-plucked bird which is already dead.

Perhaps a more effective campaign would be to encourage people to keep their own bird, giving them a chance to see whether or not it has a personality, in the hope that they then decide, of their own free will, not to kill the bird when the holiday season arrives.

Mind you, would it then be OK to kill the bird if you discovered it was a sociopathic, criminal turkey with no friends?

Sodding PETA, get on my fecking wick! I am a veggie and stick up for animal rights, but organisations like PETA just make the rest of us who have made personal choices, look like complete fecking loonies!

Here's an idea instead of ramming your ideas down everyone's throat trying to grab headlines, how about a programme of educational options in schools and public places, supplying sensible ideas? You don't see IFAW or the Veggie Society running naked up the high street drenched in fake blood to prove their point? Enough to make me go back to meat, just to teach those twats a lesson!

Instructive too. Should save me a packet next christmas 'cause I can kill, pluck and prepare my own turkey now. Thanks PETA.

I didn't realise you could actually eat tofu either, I always thought it was for holding windows in place or something so you learn something new every day....

Paris, she eats meat, I've seen the video

I hope this gets an IP lawsuit. Other than that.. PETA is the reason there are so many accidents involving dear in PA, You can't hunt dear on national lands in the US, because when they schedule a hunt there are PETIDIOTS running around the woods in dear costumes..

What I propose is a national initiative to re-seed the population of Cougar that originally controled the dear population. And then make sure we dress up some of these idiots as dear.

This game dosent show up the (admitidly very bad) practices of the intensive meat industry, but panders to the "ewww. Thats so horible" view of most vegies, who don't seem to hold a moral view point on meat, but a "oh fwuffy animuws" view.

Fun game though.

"PETA is the reason there are so many accidents involving dear in PA." -- Speaks for itself.

I eat meat, but that game convinced me to keep eating meat.

PETA realism is every thing you should of got a consaltant cook in there would have told you

a. blood on your cooking implements after not before as they harbour germs. eveything would have been spot lessly clean before starting.

b. personally i'm have prepared the stuffing first before the chicken just personal choice gives less time for draining as the "juices" in the chicken improves the taste of the stuffing.

c. you don't dump the egg shells in the bowl too. just the yolk and white

d. these not much blood when i plucked the chicken i went with the grain and there was little to no blood.

e. you remove all the organs in one go (well i did anyway.) and you keep them to make soup or stock or something. ( afriend puts it in her compost heap which she then spreads in her veggie patch )

f. head removal one word clever takes one blow. (and you forgot removing the legs)

when i was younger i didn't know whether to work in IT or to be a chef decided i didn't wanna work christmas so went into IT. if really was last minute decision on college enrollment day. and hate seeing stuff done wrong especially with food (i mean food poisoning is not good) the reason i've plucked a chicken is when i was a scout we did a suvival day on a camp they split us into groups and gave you a chicken and said that's your groups dinner prepare, cook and eat that i ended up in the group of (newly found ) veggies so i did it all myself. it's amasing how quickly they recovered when it was cooked and they were hungry.

unforunately i was ill during the sarvival weekend a few months later so missed me chance to prepare rabbit. :-(

fire to cook my rabbit cause rabbits tasty (yes i know they are cute and fluffy too!)

PETA = People Eat Tasty Animals :-)

Well if you do go round shooting "dear", especially "old dears", then you should manage a jolly good bag. It's easy, but not very good sport as they can't move that fast - those old ladies aren't that sprightly.

I think that Tom Lehrer summed it up well in the "Hunting Song" - something that could almost have been written for Dick Cheney. However, I'm not sure we can blame PETA for the fate of his victim as, as I rather suspect he wasn't a member of the organisation.

"But in the end, Mama has a change of heart and replaces her bloodlust with a craving for tofu-formed mock-turkey"

Why do vegetarians feel the need to make non-meat based foodstuffs look like they came from an animal.

Suggestions in less than 10 words please.

Interesting way to kill 10-15 minutes - ended up scoring just over 1000 which probably goes to show that I am an evil, heartless bastard after all. The 'tofu' endgame was hilarious for all the wrong reasons - I wonder if any of the PETArds have actually eaten the bloody stuff, much less made faux-turkey out of it.

The might even net some sales for Nintendo too - I'm currently debating whether or not to buy a DS and play Cookin' Mama for real.

There's a place for all of God's creatures, and it's right next to the mashed potatoes.

Flames, 'cos I like my meat well done.

Title says it. Gross, tofu turkey. Or as "they" call it "tofurkey". I've had a nice fried tofu a few times (Kung Pao for instance), it's good, but the tofu stuff that pretends it's meat? Barf. The "hamburger" is all spongey, and the rest are even worse.

All their campaigns ever do is make me hungry. I saw an anti-chicken nugget ad. It made me want chicken nuggets.

Guess what this made me do? I want turkey dinner now. Thanks PETA, now I'm hungry.

Everyone has a right to their views, just don't shove it on me.

PETArds! Thank you.

If God hadn't wanted us to eat animals, (s)he wouldn't have made them out of meat.

No wonder they don't eat meat if that's what their food looks like after preparing it. Dumbasses. I wonder how they would have survived 200 years ago..

He wouldn't have made them out of MEAT!!!

Can I pretend to be really hard just cos I eat meat?

"That's just nature. I don't see them petitioning lions to stop eating zebras."

So you didn't watch any of the inter-level movies then? Try this http://www.peta.org/cooking-mama/bonus-video2.asp and then tell me just how that had any relevance to a pride of lions catching and eating a zebra?

"So long as the beast has been killed humanely by a well trained slaughterer, it's time to chow down."

Again, maybe you should have watched them movies before talking out your arse. Turkeys are not required to be 'killed humanely' (that phrase puts me in mind of 'collateral damage') and just how many people working in slaughter houses go through slaughterer's university?

Factory farming is designed to provide cheap meat. Cheap meat means little, if any, humanity cos that would cost money.

Oh yeah, and tofu mostly tastes like shit.

I don't like veggie propaganda, but I am a veggie. It's great.

One day, not in our lifetime, the civilised world will be meat free and religion free.

I hold no hope for those backward cavemen in the middle east though...

As in People for the Ethical Treatment of Plants and Vegetation. As humans must consume food for sustenance (sorry, we are not flora--the best we can do with sunlight is to produce Vitamin D). And some critical substances such as Vitamin B12 *only* occur in animals (either that or eat up lots of bacteria out of the ground). So suppose some people come to a realization that plants are alive as well and therefore should deserve the same protections and care as animals. Suddenly, you have a group of people who would be shouting at us to start caring for plants and eat animals (who also eat plants) instead. Put them together with PETA, who wants us to do the exact reverse, and you're up the proverbial creek. We can't eat plants, we can't eat animals, and we can't photosynthesize--IOW, we starve.

[Activating Rant Matrix]

After nailing a score of 1152 i must be more evil than a room full of Hitlers! But that aside i must wonder what monstrosity i wrought when apparently "thanks to me" Cooking mama now loves animals and instead makes a turkey out of TOFU after butchering an 'innocent, defenseless animal'. Oh yes PETA, this is the 21st century and its called -survival-

Also if PETA had their way then the whole world would likely be at the very least be forced into becoming veggie. Then you'd have the problem of growing enough plants for more than a few billion hungry people, plus pests, drought, thieves trying to feed their malnourished family and although there are vegetables that provide iron, i'm to understand that you'd need to eat way more in order to match the protein levels offered by a Tender steak. Unless vitamin supplements are added but thats similar to a draw full of pr0n.

[Deactivating Rant Matrix]

aaahhhhhh

Plants don't have a central nervous system and therefore don't feel pain.

I'm sure you knew that, or maybe you really are stupid.

No but they do have feelings and go into shock when someone abuses them. Plus there was something else but i can't quite put my finger on it but its based on PETA going from Animal rights that you can get behind to a brainless propaganda machine.